i dont know where to start.
maybe i'll start off by wishing happy new year
(both maal hijrah 1430 n 2009).its a tad bit late,but hey,this is my first post of the year.
hm.so life had been great.
really great,frankly speaking.i was actually enjoying being in my own skin rather than to act like a stranger to myself these days.able to find myself again.able to actually stand on my own principles again.able to believe that yes,someday i will find love,and to believe that,good things do happen to those who wait.
until four simple words were spoken.so simple,yet they burn right down to the core.
and now i'm back being lost,restless,confused,oh-so-fuckingly stupid and surprisingly...sad?
or maybe devastated is the right adjective.maybe.
obviously it was my own fault.gatal sangat nk involve balik kan.gatal sangat nk act mcm i'm some kind of an avid fan.gatal sangat to believe that,that maybe,there is still ray of hope for me.
and being so effin degil,i'm believing that there still is.
i know everything is so obvious.n everything has been planned.n everything whatsoever has nothing to do with me.
and i know myself that i've been holding the white flag right from the beginning.its just that i'm too rotten up inside to admit defeat.
i'm losing in my own game.screw me.